#which sucks because they had a good bit of traction

[rainssocks]

in your arms.

pairing: bf!seungcheol x barista!reader

you were stressed after the never ending rush at work, and the movie you watched with seungcheol was initially exciting, thrilling even. until it wasn't. but with him around, everything would be okay.

genre: romance, fluff, established relationship

au: non-idol

warnings: mentions of gore, a little bit of trauma (reader's), fluff, comedy?, cheol babying reader, reader between cheol's legs

word count: 0.86k

a/n: wait my first actual post?? this is kinda crazy... this is probably the only story out of the 4 that i've written that i might have developed enough to be satisfactory... anyw pls enjoy the story hehe

on a cozy rainy night, you and seungcheol had your usual sunday movie date where you two would be all snuggled up on the bed together watching all kinds of shows that gained traction online within that week.

work had been extra tough that day. as a barista, you will always hate the morning rush, and even more so on weekends. weekends sucked, because even lunch hour would be hectic, and your precious break time would be cut short. you'd be forced to be on your feet all day, getting lashed out by picky customers that nitpick at every single thing you do, even if by textbook it was all within reasonable standards. whether it be your attitude, or their coffee being the wrong temperature, or how their name would be spelt wrong, or how you would be moving so slowly when there would be tsunamis of customers crashing the store for a good cup of coffee, and really, all these things had you running on thin patience the entire day. truth be told, your muscles ached like there was no tomorrow and you wished that you had a massage chair that could do miracles to relieve your aches and stresses and body pain and-

a scream. one that yelled bloody murder.

an ear-piercing screech came from the tv. the woman in the movie had been stabbed repetitively by the ghoulish monster that sought nothing but death. there was the dread in her bloodshot eyes with those pathetic tears that flowed down her face. such a scene that was filled with so much gore, was met with sudden silence. you snapped out of the trance you were caught up in.

“oh my god. no.” you thought to yourself. all this was starting to feel a little too familiar.

you had been so lost in your own thoughts and yet so engrossed in the show that you yourself felt the terror shivering throughout your entire body. you turned to hide your face in the crook of seungcheol's neck in fear, clinging onto him for dear life as if you were about to treacherously detach off a zipline and fall to your death. you felt him tense up behind you from your sudden movement of hiding into him. the large muscular arms that once rested on your thighs were now wrapped around your waist. he saw the fear that had enveloped you to find a safe space to seek shelter in written all over your face as he lifted your head to see the tears that fell from being so petrified.

"awh, you poor thing…"

his eyes widened at the realisation of what was happening, and it hit him like a trainwreck of just how exactly you were feeling, and what you have gone through. yet, his face softened at the sight of you being so frightened like a little puppy, which only made him want to baby you more. one hand reached up to your head to ruffle your freshly dried hair, and the other still tightly gripped around your torso, his thumb caressing your back to soothe out the nerves.

you sniffled as you childishly scolded him for ever choosing this film.

"cheollie... why'd you pick this show..." you whined in protest of his film choice, blaming him for ever letting you watch it.

your tears turned into sobs which only became more uncontrollable, and it was like seungcheol could feel his heart breaking along with yours.

in his embrace, your tears soaked his shirt and you felt the low rumble of his chest as he gave you the much needed reassurance to calm you down.

"baby, i would have never picked this show if i had known it was this scary for you. its all because of that darned yoon jeonghan..."

he didn't mention it, but he could feel the guilt creeping into him and eating him inside out. however, that didn't matter much now. he continued to complain about how everything was jeonghan's fault for ever recommending this show to him and how he was verbally bashing jeonghan behind his back. after all, his main priority was to cheer you up.

of course, this silly act in front had you start calming down in almost an instant. seungcheol had turned the tv off to shut out whatever had caused your momentary panicked breakdown, and all that was left was only you, him, the warm blanket that had been kicked off in the moment and the sound of the pattering rain on the windowsill.

this intimate moment was so precious to both of you, even if you hadn't realised it yet.

the nice strong arms that wrapped around you gave the right amount of protection that you needed, the nice smelling man that was rambling on about how dumb his best friend was, and just how secure you felt in his arms.

in the moment, the flash of vulnerability that you showed him only proved one thing. seungcheol loves you and will always be the support pillar that you can always lean on. the night was cold, yet you only felt warm and safe right there in his arms.

[theblacklewinsky]

Note: i feel so good from the traction I got from the last post 🥹 y'all r angels. here's the part 2 you were looking for, boo! @avoidthings 💗

JADED | AARON PIERRE

Part 2.

Toxic!Terry Richmond x Black!Female Reader.

warnings: MNDI!! this story is 18+ with depictions of but not limited to; sexual content ( penetrat!on, orgasm denial), extreme language (cursing, use of n-word, use of b-word), talking you through it. lil bit of exhibitionism if you squint, mild daddy k!nk.

summary: in which you decide to end the toxic situation-ship you share with Terry— except this man only know how to suck you back in.

baby, we can fuck inside my truck, shit wide body.

knew i'd be hurt to see if you leave, but god got me.

Choked out heavy sighs slipped past your lips as you lay in the backseat, just how he liked you; folded up. He had your meaty thighs pinned back, your arms wrapped around them comfortably, holding yourself open for Terry. He'd just got you back there, in that position and he was already inside of you. Gazing down at you with soft eyes, he said nothing at first, his thumb and pointer finger lazily pulling and pinching at your already sensitive buds.

His fingers continued tweak with your nipples, manipulating them anyway he seen fit as his short, hypnotizing strokes seemed to get deeper, fester, mind dizzying. "Oh my god, daddy!" You whined, eyes going crossed as he found that spot again. That same spot his fingers were so easy to find, his dick had no problem as well. Stars danced behind your eyes as you zoned in on that pleasure, face beautifully frowned as you held onto your thighs tightly, acrylic nails digging into your own flesh. You felt everything, from him tweaking with your nipples down to the slight burn from how he stretched you. You were wet, he had you so wet, the slick sounds of your pussy filled the car, lewd and loud.

Terry nodded above you, eyes trained on you, face stoic, as if fucking you on a Thursday night in the parking lot of an apartment complex was a normality at this point. "Yeah, you feel that shit baby?" He mumbled pulling his left hand from your nipple and using his thumb to rub your clit in quick lazy circles, the squelching and gushing sounds of your pussy didn't do anything to help out how incredibly brainless you'd felt already. "Mm-mm," he hummed abruptly pulling his right hand down away from your nipple slapping his hand against your cheek firmly, "bring yo' ass back here. Ain't no zonin' out, bitch. Come back'ere."

The slaps seemed to bring you back, just barely, but it didn't dull the overwhelming amount of pleasure you were experiencing. Your breath seemed to hitch in your throat, you wanted to moan, you wanted to scream but everything was too good in this moment. Terry seemed to not take notice of this, or simply not care because this didn't deter him from his already breath shattering strokes, instead he placed his left hand on the back of your thigh, pushing down, steadying himself on his knees as he plowed down into you. The sound of his thighs clapping steadily against your ass was enough to draw the breaths out of you. He was bottoming out. He had to feel how you clenched and creamed around him, he had to know he was damn near touching your stomach.

"Shit!" You squealed out, hands abruptly shooting out to press back against his thighs, deter him a little, get him to show you some kind of mercy. Your head was mere centimeters from slamming against the door handle.

His right hand slid from your cheek around to the back of your neck until you could feel his fingers tangling in the root of your curls at the back of your head, bringing your head forward to watch his lewd deep strokes. "Look at that shit, look at the mess that pussy makin' on my dick," he spoke through heavy breaths, his own soft groans following, "sayin' you don't miss daddy, that pussy missed me plenty though." You faintly followed the scene as your own moans drowned out the rest of his dirty words. You had him covered in cream, pussy squelching and queefing with every following stroke.

The trembling in your legs only seemed to intensify as he continued his assault on your pussy. "Daddy!" You huffed through a moan, eyes lowered and brows furrowed together you looked up at the man above you, his expression mirroring yours almost mocking. "I know you feel that!" You gasped the tightening in your stomach bubbling to the surface once again. He had you on the brink for the second time that night. He groaned in response to that, how your pussy had started to clench around him, gripping him, sucking him in.

"I feel it, baby," he cooed, fingers still tangled in your unruly curls he leaned down peppering sloppy kisses against the corner of your agape mouth, "daddy feel that pussy squeezin' me, good ass pussy." He commented breathlessly, a deep growl from his throat following, only earning more drawn out moans from you.

"You wanna cum for daddy?" He asked you, lips pressed against your ear. "I feel that shit in yo' legs you wanna cum." He teased feeling you nod vigorously against his face. "Yeah, you do baby," he hummed softly, "but you bet not cum."

You whined as his strokes didn't relent. He had denied you for the second time that night. You better not cum, yet he kept fucking you like he wanted you to. Like he dared you. You couldn't keep holding it, the pleasure was too overwhelming. He was digging as deep as he could've gotten in you. Everything he gathered from you, was messily painted on his dick.

"Fuck!" A deep groan came from your tummy, tumbling out of your mouth in a curse. Your eyes had rolled back once again, as he fucked you stupid. Your mouth hung open as he continued slamming into you, the tip of his dick kissing your cervix so tenderly. "I–I can't keep holdin it!" You stammered, voice slurred and high pitched.

Terry groaned in response, cursing quietly about how tightly you gripped him. "You can," he audibly responded, "just like you can take yo' ass on them dates." He stopped momentarily and earning a needy and eager whine from you. He sat up on his knees, dick still deliciously deep inside of you, he untangled his hand from your frizzy curls and instead fisting your rolled up tank top in his hand for leverage as he fucked himself into you once more. His free hand managed to find itself around your neck, squeezing firmly enough to make you gasp, just a little bit.

It wasn't like you could breathe anyway, there he was fucking the breath out of you once again. Your eyes watery as you held eye contact with him once again, your toes curled into a ball, mouth still agape, drool pooling there. You were fucked out, just how he liked you. Dumb and needy. The sight alone was enough to bring him closer to his nut. But he could never get his before you got yours. Taking care of his bitch was always his number one priority. He prided himself on making sure you got off first.

"Goin' out with them lame ass niggas, makin' them think they got a chance to fuck my bitch," he breathlessly mumbled to you, the sounds of your skin clapping together almost drowning the side of his deep, quiet voice.

"No!" Was the only thing you could force out, the tears brewing in your eyes finally spilling at once. You didn't know why you said no, were you letting him know them niggas never had a chance or were you tryna stop yourself from cumming all over his dick like how you wanted to, so badly.

It seemed to do the job for both.

"I know baby," he nodded curtly, "i know you daddy's bitch. I know you belong to me. Look at that pussy, wanna cum so bad. You wanna cum so bad, don't you pretty girl?"

"So pretty when you all fucked up and fucked out."

You nodded vigorously you were past the point of pleasure, you were somewhere floating, you couldn't feel solid ground beneath you if you wanted to. Words were no longer an option for you, he'd stole them many strokes ago.

"Yeah?" He moaned in response, hand squeezing firmer around your neck. "Cum on my dick baby, let me feel that shit. Don't hold back, give me all that shit."

That was all it took for a high pitched scream to come rumbling from your stomach, your eyes found themselves how they loved to be when he was inside of you; crossed. Your hands left your thighs, palms slamming flat against the seat beneath you, your nails scratching against the material. You saw colors you couldn't describe, the tension in your stomach seemingly dispersing right on que. this feeling was lightheaded, unsteady, but so so good.

But he continued on his own journey. Still fucking into you like his life depended on it. Grunting, groaning as he continued to chase his own high, the way you gripped and clenched around him as he fucked you through your orgasm was mind numbing to him. Your shit was way too good. Too good to be free. And if the sight of you getting fucked through your orgasm wasn't enough to get him to fill you up, your broken moans and whimpers sure were enough.

You couldn't take much more of this, pussy thumping as he continued to fuck you. You were completely overstimulated, coming him to cum as best as you could through your shaky, broken dialogue. 

"Fuck, fuck, fuck," he chanted repeatedly, a serious if growls and groans rumbling from deep within in his chest spilling out as he rutted into you, he was there. You were too gone in your own head when he finally did fill you up. And fill you up he did. You couldn't hear him when he pulled out either, the only thing you did react to was the soft kisses he delivered to you afterwards.

"Push that shit out, baby, let me see it." He cooed to you, his large hands holding your thighs in place, you whimpered but obliged to what he said anyways, gently pushing out what he dumped into you moments earlier. "You such a nasty bitch," he murmured in a trance like state watching his seed leak out of you, peppering sweet, gentle kisses where he could on your face, contrary to the merciless strokes he was just giving to you.

The next few moments you took to try and steady yourself, bring you back to earth somehow. This nigga had fucked you into another dimension you were convinced. You were able to ground yourself once he got out, searching the bed of the pickup to find something to clean you up with.

You sighed once you were able to come back to, chest heaving, hair unruly, and your panties and shorts strewn about his truck. I'm such a dumb bitch.



-

feral for mr. pierre. second part of many fics of him to come 😭 xx.

[irregularcollapse]

Hey, I'm so sorry to hear about how you feel about the mota fandom and what happened to you :/ I meant to send a message earlier but life got in the way. I hope you're feeling better now, and I can only tell you that your fics and writing are some of my favorite in the fandom. Just by reading your stories, I can tell the care that was put into choosing each word to best convey the story and the characters' feelings, and it is really somethinf I admire :) I hope I can be as good a writer as you someday ❤️ And for the mota fandom, I totally get what you and that anon said! If you'll allow me a bit of a rant, to me, the mota fandom is full of well-intentioned people but I found that one of its problems is that, as much as there is enthusiasm, it is going in circles. Many have said it and I've noticed it too, but some have a tendency to jump on other people's ideas without giving credit or even asking if it's okay to expand, and on more than one occasion I found one of my ideas in someone else's inbox just a week after I'd posted it which threw me off posting any kinds of hc or random ideas, I only post full fics now because I'm scared that people will see an idea/au that they like on my blog and decide to expand on it without my consent or even crediting me for the original idea :/ To me that sucks because what I love about creating is the interactions with people, but because of the seldom posting except for full fics I don't get much 😂 And I know I could post snippet or hc, but the overenthusiasm bordering on no fandom manners that I've noticed stops me from doing that. Also, as a writer, it is quite discouraging to see people constantly reccing the same 5/6 fics/authors. Don't get me wrong, those are GREAT fics and authors, but babes, there are over 1,000 works in the clegan tag on ao3, why are we constantly reccing the same fics as in summer 2024. It feels like people only read the fics with the highest hits count, and from an outsider's pov, you'd think there are only 10 writers in the mota fandom 😭 I don't if it's bc the mota fandom is new so there are a lots of people from tiktok/that weren't on tumblr/in fandom before but it truly feels like fandom manners are getting lost, despite the plethora of incredible creators in the mota fandom. So there's this opposition between the enthusiasm over new ideas that seems to die down as soon as a story is posted, except if if it's one of the big fics from the summer. Imo the actual recognition of fics doesn't follow the enthusiasm of ideas and hcs, which is a bit of a shame I think, and to be quite honest, it made me lose my motivation to write for mota bc it just feels like I'll post a fic, it'll get traction for maybe a day or two, and then it'll be forgotten somewhere when people sort ao3 by number of hits or kudos

Anyway that was quite long I'm sorry, you don't have to answer this at all, I just needed to get this off my chest, but I really hope you know that even if it may not feel that way, you are an amazing writer, who clearly loves your stories, the characters and the words you use, and that is translated to the ao3 page <3 You truly are one of the most talented fic writers this fandom has, and I'd support you and your stories in whatever fandom you may be in ❤️

I assure you, anon, that you're not the only person to feel this way! I've had quite a few private conversations with friends and mutuals about really similar experiences and observations, and how disheartened and uncomfortable it's making us feel.

I guess people don't say anything because they don't want to be seen as sowing discord or being mean. I know that there are going to be people who might see this and interpret it as me "fuelling fandom discourse" or "fandom wanking" or "being a cunt" but actually I'm just talking about how we treat creators in online spaces, and the way that people en masse have apparently forgotten that creators in fandoms are people.

I had another anon tell me that someone laid claim to one of their ideas in the tags of their headcanon post, and I don't think you're the only person whose idea has been stolen and passed to another writer. I'm really sorry that's happened to you, and you're so right to not feel like posting anything because of it! This is truly the kind of stuff that makes people not want to participate or put themselves out there. Sometimes it's even writers doing the stealing, blatantly and without credit. It makes me think that a lot of people haven't shared creative spaces before and don't know how to be polite.

I also 100% agree about the fic rec thing. It's really disheartening to see the same fics passed around over and over again, not only from a writer perspective but a reader perspective. Something that seems to have emerged in fandom spaces over the years is deifying certain authors of popular fics - fic authors being treated like celebrities, the concept of a "must-read fic", even people only reading fics and authors that are already seen as popular/successful. I get that some people don't want to spend time scraping ao3 for niche fics, that's super understandable, but that's also why it would be nice to see a bit more adventure and variety in fic rec lists!

There is a low-key competitive feeling which a few people have mentioned to me - the feeling that there are people who want to "win" fandom or be the most popular/most reccd/most recognised writer, or whatever it may be. I just feel like anything that makes people feel like they're better than others is... come si dice... not good. I think it's a shitty way to treat people you're sharing a creative space with, to view them as competition and commodity.

Writing for consumption or writing for audience approval isn't something I've ever done, but I feel like it's cropping up more and more in fandom spaces too - not just MOTA, either. That's sort of a different discussion, but I do feel it's related to the copying/stealing in a way as well.

Now I also have to apologise for this getting too long! I'm glad you got it off your chest, and please feel free to come off anon at any time, because you've got an ally in me (and others too, I assure you). I think that everything you've said here merits consideration from everyone, at the very very least! It's in the interest of pursuing a more inclusive, supportive fandom space.

Thanks heaps as well for saying nice stuff about my writing! I only ever want to tell stories, and to give people something to enjoy that has clearly been created with care and consideration. I write to express things I want to express, and so it means a lot to me when other people see what I'm trying to say and pick up what I'm putting down. Truly madly deeply, my most boundless thanks!!! ♥️♥️♥️

[therealvinelle]

(A question for both you and muffin)

What speed do you guys write?

I feel like you guys must write at such an incredible rate based on the work you produce in such a short amount of time. Any tips if you have any to increase output would be appreciated!

You were lost in the drafts! I'm so sorry.

To answer your question: it depends a bit on the fic, but typically we write as fast as we're typing, then get distracted, then write, then distracted. Sometimes we take turns being distracted.

It used to be we'd outline the entire chapter in great detail, but as we've gotten this down to a routine it's bullet points.

It's very relaxing and meditative.

As for how we're able to write that fast, I think it's threefold:

We're both picturing how a given scene should unfold, and then writing down what happens. I don't come up with a character's dialogue, I'm just writing what he said and describing how he says it or what he's thinking. Slowness or hesitation mostly occurs when we don't know what happens next or disagree.

No second guessing ourselves over one word or sentence for more than two minutes, no obsessing over getting that perfect sentence down. It was hard at first to get used to, but watching @theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin get ahead and write the good bits while I was contemplating how to phrase the last sentence of a random paragraph taught me to just make a decision.

Validation - whenever I'm unsure about something, or catch Muffin writing some thing I don't love or she catches me, we can discuss right away. While it does happen that we write something, then afterwards one or both say "Hang on. That was really bad!" for the most part writing jointly means there's two people have looked at the text and found it satisfying.

My best advice is to just write, get used to just writing without worrying too much about it, and get yourself an honest person whose opinion you trust (there is a LOT of atrocious advice out there!).

(I also have an anecdote for this: there is an author I follow on a social media, who has written a fairly popular story. They also, like most of us, have reoccurring weaknesses as a writer. They mentioned having gone to a writing group or class (I don't remember which), and receiving feedback on these specific weaknesses. Rather than accept this feedback (which they had sought out by joining the group to begin with!) they came to their followers for validation, making fun of the advice and talking about how stupid the advice-giver was.

The lesson to be learned: constructive criticism can really suck because even though you sought it out, and the criticism you get is constructive and useful, you didn't want to hear it. Therefore, decide before you go if you actually want to risk being told something you didn't want to hear, and choose the criticism-giver carefully because they could be wrong.

The reason I bring this up in a post about writing speed is that you write very slowly when you're unsure of yourself, and insecurity forms a terrifying wall between yourself and that "publish" button. At least, my speed has improved vastly since @theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin became my beta and later cowriter.)

You also want to be careful with planning the story. Planning isn't writing and it often isn't really planning either, it all too often slides right into coming up with headcanons and aesthetics for a complex daydream. If that's what you want to do, go forth, and god knows there's an audience for moodboards and headcanon posts, but if you're serious about wanting to get the story down in writing then you've got to ask yourself whether your plans for the story are in fact plans or not.

I will also advice, insofar it is possible, to not pour too much of yourself into your writing. If it's your darling who owns your whole heart, you're fiercely proud of it, then having somebody say "Hey, this could be a lot better" is all the more discouraging. Abandoning it if it loses traction or you're not sure where to go with it is also devastating. You should love what you do, by all means, but don't tie your self-worth as a writer in the individual things you produce. Even the greats have flops alongside their masterpieces, or just less good works. Focus on having fun and enjoying what you do, drop a project without guilt if you lose passion for it, put it on pause if you want to pursue a different project, and be clear on what feedback you want from beta readers. Fanfiction writing is a hobby, and unlike most hobbies it's completely free. Treat it as such.

Best of luck!

[tkachuktkaching]

Matthew and Brady on @ The Rink Podcast

Most of what they said bits of it has already come out in previous articles a few weeks back

Brady discussed his summer wedding, his excitement going into the season, the growth of his team and what he learned watching Matthew and the Panthers go on their run to the Stanley Cup Final last season.

Brady : "Just to see the every-day grind of taking care of himself, making sure he's ready for the game, and just as a leader too, taking care of yourself so you're able to demand from the rest because you're doing it right," he said. "I'm definitely ready and hopefully it'll be me in the playoffs soon.

"Seeing what he did created a lot of motivation for me over the summer."

Matthew discussed the broken sternum he sustained during the Stanley Cup Final and the pain he was in, the help he got from his brother at that time, Brady's bachelor party in Miami, and feeling a different vibe in the South Florida market after last season.

"Very different," Matthew said. "A lot more buzz. There's a lot of buzz around every sports team. It's turning into a sports crazy town and that makes it fun. [Soccer star Lionel] Messi coming in makes that much more buzz. The past few years the Dolphins have been great. What us and the Heat did last year really gave a lot of traction for us as a hockey team. So it's pretty cool." via NHL.COM

Listen to Brady from 16.04 Matthew from 40.30

______________________________________________________________

A few added things from Matthew's interview on the podcast some of which we've already heard & posted previously but included here for anyone that missed it first time round.

His injury allowed him to work on his strength & conditioning.

He wishes there was no social media after all the wedding stuff posted online, his family like to have a good time at weddings and doesn't know where people get this stuff (footage that goes viral).

Things Brady is better at than him: a better shot, video games & being a all round better human being than him (but he'll work on that!), Matthew says he himself is a ball buster, Matthew takes the bragging rights when it comes to Golf though he says his Dad is better at chirping and more witty & more funny than him & thinks his dad's game was underappreciated & underrated at the time he played, people realise from Matthew & Brady's game style how good & valuable he was and his dad gets belated recognition which he appreciates.

Says Brady's bachelor party in Miami took a few years off his life!

His summer consisted of the trip to Nashville for the player Awards, laying around in the hotel doing nothing, Bachelor parties, four weddings, and a trip to Montana in August, though he hasn't really done much of anything over the last month.

The Blood vessels and stuff were the the scary part of his injury at the time and half his body felt like it was out here, he knew something wasn't right, he didn't know what it was at the time, until they did his tests the next day. He was in the most pain after winning game three the overtime win. But now he's all good.

It was doctors who gave him the go ahead to do what he could to play just one last game. Despite the serious nature of his injury he would do it all over again if he had the chance.

He's excited to get going for camp & the new season though mentions the missing guys until around Christmas will be a tough ask (Montour & Ekblad) he feels The Panthers have more depth especially with the D this year.

Calls Alex Lyon The Lyon King & Big praise for his (Lyon) & Bob's heroics. How they had to play with only six D & two Goalies with Knight's absence last year.

The goal is to again make the playoffs, and be in the mix he wants to get of to a good start and how it sucks to have to chase for a spot like they had last year.

The Allstar was a good jump start because the Panthers weren't doing well as a team at that point which created a buzz that carried on leading on the cup run.

[whysamwhy123]

Huh. The first OrangeHook fic I wrote now has the most hits out of anything I've written in the last two years. Weird.

I guess you never really know which fics are gonna take off. But still, this is hard for me to wrap my head around. I figured nothing would ever overtake the previous top dog, since that was for a very popular pairing (at the time) and also I wrote it as part of a fandom event, so naturally it was gonna have a few more eyeballs on it than usual. For a rarepair fic, of a pairing that's almost completely dead (the 'almost' being there due to the tireless work of my good buddy Dah, single-handedly keeping the OrangeHook train a-rollin' in 2024 *blows a kiss*) to overtake that, and still be getting traction here and there after over a year, is kinda nuts.

I have a weird relationship with that fic, in general. When I posted it, I really wasn't happy with it. It has Problems, LOL. The more time that passes though, I've kinda warmed to it more and more. It still has those Problems, for sure, but it came together pretty good in the end, I think? Probably some of my best dialogue, at least. That fic was only supposed to be two scenes - the opening scene with Best Friends, and the Awkward Hotel Room Seduction Scene - but it kinda ballooned as I was writing it, and I kept adding more and more. I don't think I realised at the time that OrangeHook was gonna become My Pairing for a good while. But it certainly did.

I'm in a...weird place, at the moment, regarding writing. Well. I don't know if I'm even qualified to say that, because the short version is - I ain't writing no' mo'. Haven't finished a fic, or even written more than a couple words, in over two months. Considering I was averaging one fic a month since January 2023, that's a downgrade for sure. This definitely isn't one of my usual writing slumps. I have Ideas (Such Ideas!) but zero motivation to write any of them. This isn't fandom's fault, to be clear. I do feel very out-of-touch and like the fandom's passed me by, but that's just because I don't watch AEW anymore because *almost falls back into old habits and launches into one of my annoying hater rants that I used to do all the goddamn time before I realised how lame that was and made myself act my age for once* reasons, and so I'm not particularly interested/invested in any of the popular pairings these days. The only pairings I do care about are ones like OrangeHook - microscopically small rarepairs where it's literally just me and one other person, and that's it. As much as I adore those folks (Gato <3 Dah <3), it's hard to find motivation when you know there's no audience waiting for you. Makes you feel like there's no point, y'know? Doesn't help that all of my ideas these days are goofy, self-indulgent AUs or bizarre crackfics. Even if I could put pen to paper, so to speak, I wouldn't exactly be giving the people what they want, LOL.

After I failed to get my Halloween fic done (it was, predictably, a goofy, self-indulgent OrangeHook AU about Jim falling under the sway of Hook, who's an incubus. Y'all are welcome that I didn't put that out into the world, LOL), I kinda figured that I might be done with writing again. Before January of last year, I hadn't written a word in years. I gave up on writing after some Bad Stuff happened. It felt like a gift to be able to do it again, after so much time. Kinda sucks to think I might be back to just Not Being Able To Do It At All again. Kinda really sucks.

There is this one idea. I've had it rattling around in my brain for a long time. It actually started as a Hookhausen fic (remember them? Where does the time go?), but I ended up adapting it to be OrangeHook over time. I have a lot of scattered ideas for scenes, bits of dialogue, and a pretty strong sense of what The Point would be. I did toy with the idea of starting it a while back (or at least trying to) and making it my swansong for the fandom/my writing in general. One last self-indulgent rarepair fic that no one cares about, and then I could peace out. To draw a line under things, y'know? Tie a little bow on this whole writing experiment of mine and then move on to...I don't know. Something else. Nothing? *shrugs* But that fic would be a big undertaking, at least for me. Would probably take a long time. A lot of work. And I ain't exactly drowning in free time. Plus, the aforementioned not-having-written-a-word-in-ages thing. I don't know.

We'll see, I guess.

If you read all of this, first of all - I am so very sorry, LOL. Second, thank you. If you're someone who's read anything I've put out there in the last two years, thank you. From the bottom of my heart, thank you. There's been...a lot of ups and downs, but overall, I'm really glad that I was able to get back into this, even if it didn't last too long. I'm pretty proud of a lot of the fics I managed to write, and while I know I was never the most popular girl in school, I hope that some of my silly stories entertained you. Made you laugh, or distracted you from the awfulness of reality for a spell. God knows, that's what all of your fics, and this fandom in general, did for me. Y'all are so nice. Creative, supportive, funny. It's kinda comforting, knowing that the fandom is still going strong. You kids have fun! Maybe this is goodbye, or maybe I'll channel that wrestler mentality and have 'One more match!' and then I'll retire. Who knows? But regardless, I'm glad I got to do this. No regrets. Well, maybe some, LOL. But for the most part...yeah. Shit was fun, yo. I did the damn thing.

OK, I'll shut up now, I promise *awkwardly finger guns my way out of the room*

[beevean]

I see a lot of fan art for Charlie x Alastor

I see a lot of fan art for Lucifer x Alastor

But I rarely see any fan art of Charlie X Vaggie lmao

(I know it's because Charlie and Vaggie's dynamic is bland compared to the other ones but I still find it funny)

What's with stories always making the main couple so boring and formulaic?

Multiple factors, I'd wager.

in HH's case in particular, Alastor is the most popular character in the show, and therefore the most shipped. This goes way back to the days of the pilot, where Radiodust gained a lot of traction despite Alastor and Angel only having one interaction, and it was Angel jokingly proposing to suck Alastor's dick lmao. Anyway, dude is nowadays shipped with... pretty much the entirety of the main cast except Velvette and Valentino lmao.

With very few exceptions, M/M and M/F ships tend to be more popular than F/F ships. There has been infinite discourse about this disparity, and I can't tell you exactly why, you draw your own conclusions.

Charlie and Vaggie are an already established couple, and have a very healthy, stable relationship with only a few hiccups, including the very big reveal that Vaggie hid her nature from Charlie, but the rushed pace of the season made them get over it quickly. From a representation standpoint, this is pretty good, it's nice to have a very normal lesbian couple not treated any differently. From a shipping standpoint, it's boring lmao. There's no conflict nor a journey to follow like in the case of Huskerdust.

Vaggie was also toned down from the pilot, possibly because some people criticized her as a stereotypical angry Latina - now she's just grumpy, as well as out of focus, and no one song shared with Carmilla is not enough. Not a good way to endear your character.

However, in theory, one could elaborate on those hiccups. Vaggie is basically Charlie's guard dog, and she admits in one episode that she ties her selfworth around being able to make her happy, but when you look at their interactions, Vaggie doesn't seem to ever be on board with Charlie, creating fiction. You can even see the hint of a power imbalance, which is always appealing for shipping. Then there is, of course, the reveal, that could shake their relationship even further and make them go on a journey to learn how to trust each other. Now, why won't many fans think of this? Well...

I don't go there so I don't have personal experience myself, but stereotypically, F/F shippers tend to favor sugary scenarios. I hear all the time how female characters are only allowed to be cute and hold hands, and never be as twisted and edgy as many, many M/M ships :P so the potential of making Chaggie a bit "spicier" to fix the shortcomings of the show is hardly explored. And even if it is...

... Charlastor is right there. Charlastor, with Alastor happily helping Charlie but hiding his own nefarious agenda. Charlastor, with Alastor teasing Charlie in a much more playful way, even touching her. Charlastor, with the two genuinely, openly trusting each other, Charlie with her feelings in general and Alastor with his ultra powerful mic and believing in her potential. Charlastor, that ended with Alastor breaking down about a deal that constrains him and is implied to be the very reason he's serving Charlie in the first place. Even if Alastor wasn't the fandom blorbo, no shit Charlie is much more shipped with this guy! The dynamic is much more unique and is bound to go somewhere!

Main couples don't have to be boring. For example, no one ever dared to break Rupphire apart because they were just that lovable together, both in Garnet form and separated: they had chemistry, we saw how we got closer, we saw them argue for a whole episode, we saw them being openly affectionate towards each other. Chaggie in my opinion is just another victim of HH's rushed, unfocused pace, that left poor Vaggie in the dust and reduced her to Charlie's grumpy but loyal gf.

(now don't ask me why Radioapple got so popular lmao. I don't get it. I guess Hell's Greatest Dad slaps that much)

[risingshards]

Writing Year in Review 2024 Part 1: Wins and Defeats

Doing this a bit earlier than the 31st but I pretty much have the gist of things. On paper this should be a year I should be celebrating writing-wise. I got my first print book deal (for a nonfiction junior book not like big doorbuster fantasy deal but still!) and my first premium web novel in Reborn in a Fighting Game with My Rival.

I should be doing a victory lap but I just feel like I failed. In my most recent meeting with my writing workshop someone said I must be feeling great with the year I had, but internally I was like, I don't feel like I had a great year. I'm gonna try to weave in some good vibes but this is gonna be yet another mopey post in a year filled with em I have a feeling.

✅ for wins and ❌ for things I feel like I failed on.

✅I was able to keep up with a bunch of projects at once. While writing Reborn, I kept writing Rising Shards, and took on an extra challenge in trying for an action fantasy web novel contest in Lost Hero. A half point off on this because juggling everything put me very far behind and keeping up with writing and work was tough.

❌Readership woes. I don't want to sound ungrateful at ALL for the wonderful amazing and kind readers I have, but on a sheer numbers level this year was rough. Watching Rising Shards lose 50% or more of its readership hurts, and I'm not sure what exactly I did, or if I did anything, but you know I'm gonna overthink it.

I had a month of short interlude chapters to give myself break last January and views fell off, maybe that did it. Maybe the arc I chose to pursue this year wasn't the right one. Maybe RS is just too long now and people fell off and there's no hope of getting them back with the kind of story I want to write. Maybe I'm not getting featured anymore which boosted my views. Maybe I just fucking suck at convincing people to read my work. I would guess it's a mix of everything there but I have this need to keep going with Rising Shards even though it's super duper long now. It's my comfort series and they're my comfort characters, and I'm a firm believer in a primarily slice of life series that goes really long being a potential source of comfort for others. I still have a ways to go on it so I hope I can get my numbers up so I don't get depressed about it every so often.

✅I wrote a nonfiction book that will be in print soon. This project was so tough to work on and I don't know if I'll share it on here since it was through a local publisher, but soon I'll have a book that I wrote in print.

❌The Lost Hero. My action fantasy contest entry didn't get much traction and didn't advance in the contest. It was such a sprint getting it done but sad to have come short, and in hindsight thinking about it, I made so many mistakes writing it that I didn't really deserve to even make it to round two.

❌Projects I wanted to get to but couldn't. While I did get three going at once, there was still a bunch I didn't make as much progress on as I wanted. I've been trying to do a Patreon exclusive series forever but made zero progress on that (and made negative progress on my Patreon sigh), and had some other series I wanted to work on.

✅Reborn in a Fighting Game with My Rival. My big win of the year, a dream come true. I entered this series into Tapas' romance web novel contest last year and it made the top 50 and was picked up. I am 95% done with the series and am writing the ending now (Obligatory note that I want to do a Season 2 or a sequel someday), and it has been such a pleasure to work on even when it got tough. The staff from Tapas has been so cool and supportive and understanding of the writers and I am incredibly grateful for this opportunity. The day it launched will forever be a special day to me.

So more losses than wins. The wins were pretty big, but the losses sting really hard. Overall, I should be proud of how I did last year, juggling three series, having my first premium series, etc. but I feel more disappointed in myself than anything. I hope I can use these feelings to push forward and pull something amazing off, but for now I feel like I tripped and fell into the trenches and have to figure out how to get back on my feet.

Part 2 here

Part 3 here

[davekat-sucks]

this might be a very, very unpopular opinion here but personally I do like some of of these “headcanon” art stuff. Don’t get me wrong I completely understand why they can be a problem but personally I kinda like the designs of some of these tumblrified characters. Cringe for sure but some of them are admittedly, pretty. For me, as long as they don’t have a shown cannon race it’s kinda free game.

Hey, that's cool, you do you. I do as I do. We don't all have to be the same. Try to not say something you like is cringe though, as that takes away a bit of credibility or like you don't agree with yourself. Also genuine question, which scale are we using here, rcdart or vivziepop or twitter pinkie pie?

call me woke or whatever but it’s just my kind of cringe that I personally like. It’s stupid, it’s silly, and it’s even ugly, but I guess it just fun to see how people could change one character so much that it ends up reflecting them or whatever while still trying to somewhat look like the character they buried in a thousand “headcanons”. Plus, it’s good character ideas (as in appearance.)

I won't call you anything, you seem like a nice and polite anon that has a different viewpoint than me, that's okay. I will say though, at that point, why not make ocs instead? Being honest, I want to steal some designs from homestuck because Hussie sucks and the characters had potential, but if the objective is to make them look like a reflection of the artist or only for personal use, why even re-imagine a particular character in the first place? In my opinion, it's because deep down it's been proved that that kind of art usually doesn't sell very much, so it's the original IP attached to it that gains traction.

Think of how many reboots are created nowadays, and how every one is worse than the last, if it didn't have the OG IP attached to it in the first place, I doubt anyone would have even looked twice at something like the PPG from 2016, Tiny Toons (they made two characters who were lovers become siblings) or even Velma.

overall, I like some of these tumblrised designs. They are kinda charming. Maybe cause I’m more “left-leaning” or something but it’s just a guilty pleasure of mine to just look at designs I think are nice no matter how ugly they are to others. One man’s trash is another man’s treasure.

Amen, brother, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. But also, I think it's a slippery-slope, because remember HONE? How the same people that draw these characters as FAR AWAY from the original design as possible criticize her so much when she actually was the one drawing as similarly to the original comic style in the first place? Some people try to virtue signal with their designs to be "inclusive" so much that they circle back to being actually unironically racist because they insult a japanese artist because of their art style.

and personally I do feel bad for liking stuff like this. Like I agree with some of y’all’s points here but I don’t know, I think I’ll just put my opinion over this issue.

Again, don't be ashamed of what you like, if it makes you happy, you find something of value in it and you're not harming anybody, what's the issue? I don't think you're like the same people that try to guilt trip others for not drawing like the "tumblr style", but the reality is that that sadly is way less common than you'd think.

[gregorvorbarra]

I just realized I never gave you all a Lee Update

So,

Lee tore is Cranial Cruciate Ligament in his right knee. The vet thinks it’s been torn for a while because he has some mild arthritis in the knee now, but we noticed him limping in mid-October. It didn’t stop him from trying to be insane though.

He had Tibial Plateau Levelling Osteotomy this past Tuesday to fix it. I know not everyone wants to read surgical stuff so details on that and how it went under the cut, but Lee is doing well so far!

Enjoy this picture of Lee in jammies:

So the TPLO involves cutting the tibia and rotating it and reattaching it with a metal plate, to stabilize the knee joint. The torn ligament is removed completely. It has a really good success rate, with no post-op complications or need for long term pain management. Which is great!

Bad news is that it’s a 12-week recovery process, and Lee is going to be on “crate” rest through most of that. We don’t have a crate for him anymore, so… he’s confined to the guest room when we’re not home.

Sad!

Lee was apparently very very good at the vet the whole time. Here’s a pic the vet sent us:

Good job Lee! Best Boy.

He’s been doing well since he got home! He was Very High when he got home on Tuesday, and cried a lot, but he’s been okay since then. He’s been trying to get up and follow people around the house, which he CANNOT be doing, so we’ve had to sedate him to make sure he’s resting as he should. I’m amazed by how well he’s moving just a few days post-surgery, but I know that he needs to just SIT so that his leg actually heals. Just because he’s trying to walk doesn’t mean he actually should be. (Had an argument with my dad over this, but I won’t go into that.)

I got a pet camera so that we could check up on him while we’re not home. Best decision, no regrets, and I got a great deal on it, too.

Check out this picture from last night:

Lee, please sleep on your bed, thanks.

He’s also been reluctant to eat, so I’m having to add chicken broth to his meals. THANKS LEE!

It is EXTREMELY common for dogs with one CCL tear to blow their other knee within a year or so. So we will likely have to do this again, but I am looking up ways to try to prevent (or at least delay) it. What I’ve learned so far:

- Steps/staircases for getting onto high surfaces (beds, furniture, etc, stuff they use frequently) helps a lot.

- Rugs on hardwood/tile/slippery floors is also helpful. Gives them more traction and prevents them from slipping. (Especially when they’re going to be jumping onto something, like furniture.)

- Keeping nails short, again to prevent slipping.

I already have steps for the bed from when Lee was refusing to jump, and I’m getting some rugs. Lee usually keeps his nails very short, but I think being on crate rest for 8 weeks will lead to some long nails, so nail clipping time.

Overall, I’m very optimistic about the outcomes of this, but the recovery period’s going to suck a bit.

Anyways, thats the update on Lee! Thanks for reading, pls wish Lee the best right now. And if you have any advice, I’D LOVE TO HEAR IT!!!

[somebodytolove31]

since quinton said he liked to hear about stuff his fans go through while watching his videos uhhh here's a bit about me i guess

i discovered and binge watched the first 3 videos on the series when i was in a bad place in terms of a lot of stuff, but specially when it came to my art, i valued my art not in "do i enjoy making it" but in "would other people like it and see it", which considering im a small as fuck artist, was not a good thing, no one ever saw my art outside of my close circle (which i no longer consider a bad thing because my close circle rocks)

after the second victorious video came out, i decide to make my own Victorious AU called Failure, which would be about how the main characters grow up to NOT become stars, having very average lives and feeling kind of miserable

This post sucks, but it had what I made for it

I feel like my brain didn't came up with this idea because it would be fun for me to work on, but because it would perhaps get me traction, and it sorta did, 58 upvotes babyyy, I was honestly so thrilled about it that I wanted to write a script for it

And I couldn't, why? Because I didn't want to actually work in it, it felt more like a job than a project, and it's not like I was getting paid for it! But I felt like I had to do it because how else am I going to get a following?

I was also, yknow, severely depressed at the time so I didn't feel like drawing or writing

I also found many flaws on my first post, so I decided to make a new one, this time with no art because I was just, exhausted

Here is said version, I actually think is quite nice nowadays

I eventually got over this feeling, although it took a while, I don't even know how I did it, it just slowly happened gradually while learning to love myself

Now I'm watching the Sam & Cat video, and thinking "yknow, I should maybe revisit that au, it would be funny", and it has made me realize just how far I have come, now I don't want to make art to become famous or approved, but because I enjoy making it!!! It is honestly very nice

Tldr I'm making a victorious au maybe, you can't stop me

[b6cky]

Hi, i just read your entire bucky masterlist and I really liked it, dont know why you dont write anymore but i hope youre doing good <3

hi there anon i’m rlly happy to hear u like my bucky fics :) ❤️ i’ve written in a post before why i don’t really write anymore, but i’ll use this anon to explain so ppl can see this when they check my profile :’)

1. why don’t i write anymore?

when i got into moonknight, i made a post for people writing for the show, because i am diagnosed with DID and wanted to give my perspective on how to write a character with DID since i thought it would be helpful for writers who wanted to accurately portray the disorder (despite the show’s slightly inaccurate portrayal due to it being a tv show). i also talked about terminology to use blah blah blah, but the post got a lot of traction and i didn’t really expect it to get that big tbh? and i did get a lot of positive feedback from some people and i was really pleased with that, but i also received a lot of negativity from it, which really weighed on me for a while. i received so many hateful anons of people sending death threats, ableism and some telling me i didn’t have the disorder i had been dealing with my whole life and been diagnosed with? i pretty much stopped logging into this account after this, because it sucked A lot! this account used to be a safe space for me to write fics and now it’s not and i’ve moved from here but i am really glad that people can still read the fics on this account and enjoy them and i will not be deleting any of them, this account will be kept as it is.

2. why don’t i write for bucky anymore?

Tbh i lost the hyperfixation but possibly when the stars align again and i’m somehow hyperfixated on bucky again i’ll write a new fic for the ppl who followed this account for bucky fics 😭

tdlr, i got a lot of hate from a post that was intended to be educational and i was in a bad place mentally for a bit bc of it 👍 im v thankful for all the support i’ve gotten though, it means the world to me and i’m happy to hear that people like my writing even though it’s kinda old now 😭

[tolerateit]

First dream in the new year! I dreamed that I was somehow still in primary school and I had gym class today. But I didn't like any of my gym clothes because they were the same clothes I wore in actual gym class when I was in school. So I figured I'd leave early for school, go to a nearby mall and buy something else (my kid brain and adult brain somehow melded together so I was in school but I also had a job and was making enough money to go to a mall on a whim). Unfortunately I didn't find anything I liked so I just went to class, and it turned out my gym teacher was replaced with Trump? But he was against the way gym classes were held in schools so he had made his own curriculum which included learning about different sports. He took the entire class to a diner where we were supposed to watch some film, and then he had to go to meetings because be was also the president of the US. So a giant helicopter (there was an entire penthouse apartment inside it) came and took him away. There was something that happened with rock climbing in this bit of the dream that I don't precisely remember aside from gigantic boots with spiky sporks attached in the front that rock climbers use. Like in this link but those spikes in were front were longer and literally looked like sporks are attached in their place for more traction: https://www.feedthehabit.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/01/Photo-Jan-21-3-55-50-PM.jpg

Anyway, I took all the garbage from the table at the diner I was sitting around with my friends, told them I'd get rid of it and skip the rest of the school day because I had better things to do. Did all that and went to an appointment with a therapist. Except I had forgotten in that moment that the therapist told me we were taking a two week break and this was the day I was supposed to call her to schedule an appointment for the following week, not go in for my own appointment. For some reason, my husband, his sister, and her daughter were all at the office with me, and the therapist squeezed me in saying it's fine for both my mistake and all the people that came with me. And the appointment started. I don't actually remember what I was trying to talk to her about, but before I even got the first word in, my niece and sister in law started tickling me and laughing loudly, so I quickly stood up and curtly asked them to leave and wait outside. They did and then the therapist told me I did a good job. This entire time my husband was sitting inside with his back turned toward me because I have an easier time talking about my issues when I don't have to look at someone's face. And at that moment he spoke up and asked the therapist if I looked pale. She said yes and he started explaining how I tend to be pale when I have to speak up for myself, especially when I am in the right because I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings and I'm fine with people walking all over me to prevent that from happening. The therapist looked at me and said I am indeed pale, and asked how I was feeling, to which I responded that I was terrified my sister in law and niece would be mad at me for making them leave, and for my mistake with the appointment on top of that. Aaand then a phone call woke me up which sucks because that would have been a fun therapy session.

oh wow that was an adventure dkdjdjdn i love your mind 😭

[rabidrodent]

Attack on Titan thoughts

last night i saw the finale of attack on titan and shared some meandering thoughts on the series on twitter, but i'm reposting it here because twitter is dead and sucks.

spoilers, of course

---

man.... maaaaaan.... is that the ending everybody complained about and said ruined the series? really? that was about as perfect and justifiable an ending as anyone could hope for. aaaaaaaaa im gonna slap someone

god... GODDDD... SLAP SLAP

alright i'm gonna use this thread to wax thoughts on the series

---

so i remember when this series started, it was a huge ass phenomenon. you could not escape it. but personally i wasn't entirely on board

i watched the first season, i got the appeal enough, yadda yadda giant freaky naked guys. i didn't hate it, but just found it kinda dry and unengaging. there was a vague horror aspect which i wasn't particularly into, some dry politics, and that was about it.

so the fanaticism and meme-ry was just something i witnessed from the sidelines. then like... years went by without a season 2, and it all just kinda died down mostly. (if i was clever i would say it was... rumbling... below the surface.... but i don't feel like it)

anyways that 2nd season finally dropped, and it kinda felt like an instant difference? like it finally felt like the story was gaining traction. it still had the mystery thing going, but it also kinda stared focusing more on character relations.

so the 2nd season is when i finally got on board with the series and engaged with the plot and characters. ... of course, the 2 leading characters of the season end up completely benched soon after, which i'm still kinda salty about.

the rest is a rollercoaster, i dunno.

---

but eventually the series swaps to a new production studio, which i was a little concerned about, cause Wit did a great job, but Mappa picked it up and knocked it out the park.

the whole "final season" thing ending up as multiple seasons and multiple specials is silly as hell, but the results speak for themselves and the final product was excellent.

the final season starts from a completely different perspective, which seems like a perfect spot for production to have changed. it's a bit jarring, characters don't look *quite* how you remember, but you get used to it.

this ED... luv it. listened it it a bunch. very sweeping, a perfect last emotional beat to lead each episode into. (plus i'm only just now realizing the foreshadowing of the bird imagery.) mwah.

---

so by the 3rd season on, it's clear the series it hitched on twists and poetic character interconnections. i love that shit. yeah, characters dealing with the results of their actions through the people their actions have affected. that's the good shit gimme that

what i like about this series is that it feels like the directions it takes were thought out and planned ahead? seems like an obvious thing to do with a story, but it's fleetingly rare under the maniac workload of weekly manga production, so you take what you can get.

but i feel the series would still have rewatch value, even after you know the mysteries and twists, because you can refocus on the actions of the characters, knowing the secrets they're hiding, seeing the little clues you never noticed previously. that is good.

---

my friend, who wasn't particularly into anime, got really into the 1st season (it's a gateway series afterall), but fell off with the 2nd season... so complete opposite of me... we argued about it a couple times lol

he's mumbling about the secret of the basement, how it's not a big surprise, and im like.... you are like a tiny baby... you cannot fathom the directions this series takes

and it absolutely does go wild places leading into the final arc, enough to reasonably say it jumped the shark or whatever. but at that point it's a rollercoaster and it's all a means to an end to get the story where it wants to be.

---

and the ending. fuck, for *years* i been hearing how bad it was. {spoilers} did people really want eren to live or something? c'mon. he's clearly miles beyond redemption by that point. and it still tries throwing him a vaguely sympathetic bone in the end you can take or leave.

don't be so clingyyyy about characterssss. not every character needs to be a beacon of moral light, and not everyone needs to get a happy ending. even if you still really like the character, let the narrative take them in the direction it needs to take.

the final scenes of time passing gets very existential. it shows that, despite all hardships, it was all just a spec of sand in the hour glass of time. despite the struggles and victories for peace, war still found its way back around again.

the final shot of the boy and the dog walking toward the tree where eren is buried mirrors ymir's accidental finding of titan powers. the suggestion is it's all cyclical, and the struggle of titans will inevitably begin again, as it reasonably happened even before ymir's time.

i think that's kinda poetic. i like it. leaves you wondering what it's all for. it's nice when an ending leaves you thinking about things.

anyways this rant is aimless and no one's reading. but i'm gonna go ahead and call this shit a masterpiece, idgaf. it's not perfect, maybe not a top fav, but it doesn't need to be. it hits those strong emotional notes cleanly and consistently, and that makes my dog brain happy.

the end.

[batsarebetterthanpeople]

I'm not saying that this is good or bad btw. I think it's predictable though. Broadway musicals have a certain audience (people who can afford to go see broadway musicals) and as such the first hiphop opera (Don't mention in the heights as a gotcha it didn't have hamilton's reach and besides I wasn't incorrect I mean opera not musical, That said In the Heights does fuck go watch it) had to be about the whitest thing imaginable (the american revolution) and any musical about anything uncomfortable like the AIDS crisis has to be a bit defanged so as not to point the finger at the only people who have enough money to give them. That doesn't mean that art can't exist in that sphere. It also doesn't mean that it's not nice for people who were effected by the aids crisis or LGBT people to be able to see musicals which contain those themes even if those themes aren't as radical as we might like. Is Rent The AIDS musical in that it's the only musical that got any traction to take place in that setting? Yeah absolutely. Is it helpful for your analysis of it to go into it expecting to learn about the AIDS crisis or see a radical left wing message about how this public health crisis was ignored and weaponized by the US government as an attempted genocide against gay men and trans people? Absolutely it is not. I would love to see a musical about that but ultimately I also don't think that means that Rent shouldn't exist, I just think that maybe we should have both and that it kinda sucks that we cant because of the financial situation surrounding Broadway Musicals.

Because once you stop expecting it to do something it can't, Rent is good. Roger and Mimi have the right amount of tension, I still can't watch Angel's death without bawling my eyes out and I've seen it a thousand times, Collins is deeply relatable to me as a fellow anarchist with academic tendencies whomst is annoying, Joanne and Maureen are insane nasty, all of them suck (affectionate), the music is good. My one problem is that Mark doesn't have much of a personality but honestly hes the narrator character so that's not as much of a flaw as it could be. IDK I think it's neat.

I think my point is that people had lives during the AIDS crisis, so while broadway has endemic problems that make it impossible to do a real ACT UP propaganda musical that gains any traction, I also think that it's not wrong to make art about people in the 80s and 90s affected by HIV/AIDS living their lives and falling in love even as they're dying. I think both the musical itself and us as an audience make a mistake when we put pressure on Rent to be the AIDS musical instead of just a musical set during the AIDS crisis

The thing about Rent is that as soon as you stop interpreting it as trying to make salient political statement about the AIDS crisis and start interpreting it as a romance/found family musical about people effected by the AIDS crisis it becomes a million times better.

[faorism]

[very long post featuring a food truck turned tattoo ot3 au with mentions of former gang involvement, paying off loans, and carceral system including parole]

toby, instead of a cooking school for kids, works with incarcerated people and recent parolees. eliot has history with bike gangs and didnt snitch on anyone, but he always kept clean; they could never pin anything on him except some low level nonviolent crimes. eliot went through the program while doing time. he had a little bit of savings he kept aside, plus what he made working with toby after getting out. he got a dinky used food truck with all he had.

because the truck was bought rundown but cheap, he needs to take it in a lot to the shop closest to his mcsweetens. the best mechanic they have for a truck like that is parker. when she meets eliot, she squints and asks, hey dont i know you? and eliot flips through his mental rolodex and places her: sterling your parole officer too? which shes like oh yeah! that guy sucks right? so, about your truck blah blah. (she has had a hard life, in and out of juvie and foster care growing up for general nonviolent thievery. sterling nearly had a blood vessel burst in his forehead when she told him she got a job at a mechanics shop; she just smirked at him and said that her carjacking days were when she was a minor and hence, sealed.)

eliot puts out good food consistently until eventually, he gets traction and then he gets included on a show like diners, drive-ins and dives. his food truck gets HOT to the point that he can expand to a second truck, which parker offers to help him shop for it so he doesnt end up with another clunker. eliot is like, isnt that bad for business? and parker gives him a look and thats how eliot knows its real friendship between them. he may also kinda sorta maybe be attracted to her, but hes desperate for friends and also eventually she mentions having a guy in her life, so eliot doesnt bother.

then, a few years in, it may be ambitious with two (very busy!) trucks already out, but toby is willing to put in seed money for eliot to open up a brick and mortar, where eliot can have more freedom to experiment with his menu. eliot takes him on even as parker complains that he should replace his first truck first.

her suggestion comes back to haunt eliot when the truck dies right after hes signed the lease for the building. he feels DOOM but parker suggests that he can save on interior design by using the old truck parts for decoration. for all the years of steady customer devotion, she will chop it up for just the cost of materials and even that will be at retail price. which. feels like love really really deep camaraderie right there! (i think nate and sophie are used car salespeople who also have the side hustle of selling used parts, so they are parkers source for fixing the truck plus who she brings eliot to for the second truck)

it's a big expense to replace the truck and start up the business at once, but... eliot had a vision. he takes on loans which gives him a lot of anxiety, but its okay! his businesses continue to be successful, he can make his payments, and overall, he feels settled financially. so while not everything is smooth sailing, he's just really proud of what he's done and he wants to maybe have that reflected with how he relates to his body maybe. so. to celebrate paying off one of the loans and/or hitting an important anniversary of some kind, he wants to confront the fact that hes been wearing long sleeves since hes turned his life around because he has tats from his gang and prison days. it fits a marketable aesthetic, but he wants to move on.

he knows parker has a few tattoos of various quality: random things like a herseys bar and toucan sam. but her newer ones she's got since hes known her are very good, including a stuffed bunny toy on her thigh and (lately) her favorite tools down her back. he asks for who did, and she excitedly sends him to nana divine's tattoo parlor and piercing.

looking through the artists at nana's, he comes across a photo that stops him dead. its a gorgeous photo of sleeves: from the shoulders, citrus spills looking so plump and ready to eat in vibrant yellows, reds, whites, and greens on black skin. the fruit and leaves transform into circuit boards at the person's wrists. (alec, btw, has plans for an elaborate fandom space themed back piece; he has the outline for the enterprise already. also, on his legs he gets flashes by favorite artists plus newbies at nana's parlor who need to work on people flesh)

eliot sees that while the artist he was looking at (an alec hardison) didnt tattoo those specific tattoos, he did design them for himself. they... are gorgeous. and they inspire eliot like nothing else hes seen, and alec has done similarly thoughtful designs on light skin as well, so he's versatile. he says hes willing to do cover ups AND he prefers to work on large pieces/collections, and eliot is like yes. okay. okay. perfect.

eliot makes an appointment with alec, who is just so friendly and nice. hes younger than eliot expected considering his skill, but alec has been around nana's so long as her foster kid that he's moved past apprentice early. eliot talks about himself, more than he usually does with strangers. says how he is now a chef, and he wants to get vegetables and herbs, maybe some kitchenware or even truck/engine stuff if alec needs filler.

eliot says he is thinking just the arms and upper chest and shoulders since thats the most people see, since he wants to wear tank tops. he wants alec to plan it all at once.

(alec during this first meeting is straight with him: i dont recognize a lot of these, maybe cuz youre from way out of town. I won't refuse taking you on for this, but I need to know now if any of these support fascism or white nationalism. eliot sputters absolutely not, man. the fuck. which is nice! for sure!)

this is a dream scenario for alec, who is in love with the idea and likes the challenge of including coverups as part of the plan. he works not only with eliot for reference shots, but with parker. (parker, who he met because she has gotten her recent pieces from nana and who he has settled into a FWB situation, which slowly slowly slowly is progressing into Friends With Romance as parker warms up to him at a measured pace. parker helps with the engine stuff obviously. parker is very excited to work on something for eliot, who is happy to have her involved too.)

alec gets super into drawing the map for eliot. and then during his spare time, just.... keeps going on his tablet. he makes a separate copy of the file and just doodles the rest of what would be eliots chest and his back and down to his upper thighs,, and while alec's on the legs might as well keep going. it's a masterpiece that would take years and a fuck ton of money to complete. but obviously alec would definitely not show this because that's not fair and not what eliot asked for. this is just for alec.

when alec and eliot are doing a sit down to discuss the draft on alecs tablet, eliot is like wow. fuck this is. amazing. he asks if alec can print out a copy since he's more of a paper guy, so alec calls over shop grunt bre to print it out. hes like, theres the one that's flat and a separate file that's warped to a body, make sure to get both. when she comes back and hands eliot the paper, he goes silent.

and alec is like something wrong? and eliot turns the paper over to reveal that bre accidentally printed out alecs doodles for a full body map. its... honestly, a masterpiece. there would be a garlic braid down eliots spine. across the chest would be a "statement necklace" of chefs knives. his arms carry a bounty greens that he uses for his main recipes. theres the hint of machinery but also brick peeking out from strategic places, and its just beautiful.

alec is so absolutely embarrassed and guilty and he apologizes so hard. but eliot is like. so. i'll pay you for the full design hours. ill need to work out a budget thatll be extended over time so obviously no way this can be right away, even if we could fit it all in quickly with your schedule. you should probably make sure the design works with the rest of my tats but.... fuck man, eventually i want this all. i never would have thought to ask for this but... you have time to walk me thru it all? i can come in again if... alec is like omg yes.

eliot and alec spend a lot of time together. parker, knowing her two favorite people are together, join them when she can to hang out. eventually, eliot just starts asking parker when she's free to make sure if he has a session, she can join. alec makes a group chat for coordinating that quickly becomes chaos, memes, and begging eliot to come over to alecs to cook for them before they die of scurvy.

and as i said, eliot realizes two or three years like, fuck, i... i... really like this person @ parker. he wishes it was just wanting to have sex with her but nope, he's all i wanna kiss her and cook her breakfast. BUT he values their friendship too much to follow up on those feelings. and then he meets alec, and then he meets alec and parker, and eliot spends all this time with them, and eliot falls deep. plus, he doesnt want to make alec uncomfortable with his attraction to either him or parker, so eliot just tries to bundle it all up.

but theres only so much they can play themselves. i am not sure of the exact moment things tumble over for the three, but they do. they do, and they confess. parker makes sure to tell eliot that duh, of course she wanted him. like:

parker: okay but I clearly came onto you like. Years One and Four and you just weren't interested

eliot: ....what. no.

parker: yes i did

eliot: no, you didn't

alec: i distinctly remember her checking in around that time your two's Year Four about potential open relationship stuff if there was someone she really really liked.

eliot: absolutely not

parker then reveals she had asked eliot what she should order from the food truck sometime in Year One, thinking it was a very clear sign of interest and trust, and Eliot got the trust part of it, and fed her something delicious and even created a dish after he bought the storefront that exactly suited her tastes, but no, no he did not detect """"interest"""" at that or any other time.

eliot, turning red: hey! that aint nothing! how was i supposed to know!

parker: it worked on hardison

alec: damn eliot you could have been in this (points between eliot and parker) and maybe eventually this (points between all three) years ago

parker: so sad you didnt read the very clear signs 😔

eliot: (lip twitch)

and they have fun and alec keeps working on eliots tats with parker chilling in the room. eventually, once alec is Finally Done, he brings eliot to tat conventions for awards/display, which he of course wins. by then they are all together to the point of basically being married so there's a bit of, Look At My Beautiful Babe Who I Love. (eliot cannot help but preen a little.)

eventually, eliot gets alec to sign his canvas with his initials plus parker's, since she helped and because Eliot Is Like That, and ill just let you guess where those ended up 👀